Wasting Saturday Morning

Sept. 11, 1988


Saturday morning is the time when adults are sleeping one off, the kids are not being supervised, and neither is the TV they are watching.  And brother, does it show in the programming!

I never would have believed the  banality could hypnotize, but I've seen it happen to my own children, who, though constructed according to a first rate genetic blueprint, still sit glassy-eyed and slack-jawed in front of the tube, never laughing, never crying, never even saying "great!" or "gawdhowawful!"

And what are they watching?  If you don't see for yourself, you won't believe it.  We are talking cartoon versions of Alf and Muppets; that is, cartoons of puppets, with none of the fun or delight of the puppet originals.  We're talking about ghastly cloying green creatures called Smurfs, whose "adventures" mean nothing to the watching kids who are mesmerized, apparently , by the fact that voices so highly pitched and unmodulated can make any sense; kids who should be amazed that Jim Henson, the creator of the Muppets would allow his name on a CBS's "Jim Henson's Muppet Babies."

The children in my house are certainly not entertained by this tripe, at least not judging by their emotionless faces, yet they watch anyway. 

So what alternatives are available to children who are too ignorant or young to read and too lazy to go outside, to kids whose parents are too bleary to go out and do something with their children?  I checked out a couple of shows reputed to be "different" both on CBS.

"Pee-Wee Herman is on at 10 a.m., and it's different all right.  It's the only live-action show made expressedly for children that I could find on the commercial stations.  Herman, whose real name is Paul Reubens, is a clown in the old vaudeville tradition:  anyone who remembers Stan Laural of Laural and Hardy will recognize the character, tight suit, effeminate manner, shy, unsure disposition and all.  For purposes of the show, Herman lives in a delightful house filled with talking furniture, toys that move on their own, ordinary objects that are not what they seem and friends, human and otherwise, who like good parents have the childlike Herman's best interests at heart.  A typical show opens with furniture singing, proceeds with Herman, between diversions, getting into some jam or other, and winds up with Herman solving his problem, with help from his friends.

The show is done on an extremely childish level.  Each episode has a secret word (shades of Groucho Marx) which when uttered is a signal for everyone to scream.  In one scene a soccer playing jock teaches Herman and his young viewers how to do a simple somersault; in another Herman shows what one can make from giant underpants (a turban, a swing, etc.)

The half hour is filled with excellent stop-motion and "Claymation" type animation, and the production values are grand.

What one must understand about "Pee-Wee's Playhouse" is that it is not for adults or older children.  Unlike PBS's wonderful "Sesame Street," which can be enjoyed by all ages at many levels, "Pee-Wee's Playhouse" is aimed squarely at the pre-schooler.  The humor is at a very silly, basic plane, and Herman himself does nothing at all for adults or school-age children except to annoy them.  But when you hear my two-year-old nephew squeal with delight and see him clap his hands in joy, you know who this show is for.

Following Pee-Wee is 10:30 is "The New Adventures of Mighty Mouse."  I'd read great things about this piece of animation, about how it brings back the humor of the old "Rocky and His Friends" along with the decent drawings.  Well, forget it.  If the two episodes I saw were representative, this bit of fluff is barely a notch above "Smurfs" which is a very low starting point, indeed.

Our local CBS station, Schenectady's WRGB, has chosen to show pro wrestling at this time, so Mighty Mouse must be picked up on Burlington's WXAX channel 3.

Me?  I think I"ll sleep late.

Mac Rush works in the Banner's composing room.